I definitely think I need to go back to counseling. I was supposed to do it anyway, just not with the same lady. And I had/have every intention of doing so, but I think as more days go by I was like, “well, no. I’m fine.”
Today and yesterday I didn’t feel fine. Even with the people I have to talk about it..about her…I still think counseling is a good idea. The lady did too lol Guess that’s why we agreed to it. So I suppose I have some phone calls/emails to make.
My birthday is coming up. A little excited. I was asked if I was and I said no. Not as excited as I could/should be perhaps. But it should be cool. Maybe it isn’t so much that I’m not excited, but it just isn’t the same.
I used to have a post it on my desktop that says what she would/will say on my birthday. I think maybe when I switched computers I forgot to put it on this one. I’ll have to put it back. She would/will call me and say, “Happy Birthday, Sweetie Pie. I love you.” and probably make a statement about how I was the cutest baby (to which I will reply, “I know” lol) and maybe even cry. A few tears, at least. I would probably get an email or two also.
I miss her.