Not Thinking

I’ve realized that I haven’t been thinking about my mom lately. I don’t know if it has been on purpose or not, but I know last night when I realized it, I purposely pushed my thoughts away from her, hastily saying “don’t get sad, don’t get sad”. 

Even now, I’ve pushed it away so as I’m typing no emotions are bubbling forth. It’s weird…this way it’s almost like I just haven’t spoken to her for a long time. Or haven’t seen her for a long time for some reason. I can’t go into detail with the reasoning though, lest I realize…then I stop. Because if I finish that sentence, I’m forced back into reality. 

 

*shrugs* 

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